Chapter Nineteen: My Life HereAfter by Rosaline Saul

Even with the screeching and howling of creatures in the distance, the silence is unbearable. I want to ask David why he did it. Why did he lie about liking me, no, loving me? What does he wish to gain from it? The words I form in my head refuse to leave my lips.

I sit down on the cold ground in the clearing behind the building, pulling my knees up to my chest, and I am happy the ground feels dry and not slimy as it was in the forest.

David walks over and sits down beside me, immediately making me feel shy and self-conscious all at the same time. “I’m sorry about all the mean things I said to you about it being your fault we are here.”

I shake my head. “Don’t be. I deserve all of it.”

“No, you didn’t deserve most of it.” He sighs as he reaches for my hand and laces my fingers with his. The touch of his skin to mine makes images flash in my mind. He did like me. I see him staring at me as I walk past him laughing and joking with Charlene and Lionel. The look in his eyes is sad and longing. I see him angry with his parents, rebelling against them. Wanting their attention and affection when all they wanted and coveted was wealth and pride. He resented Mark for always doing the right thing and try as he might, everything he did was never the right thing. I see him walking up to me and it looks as if he is going to talk to me, but then just before he reaches me, a look of anger flashes across his face and he turns away hurriedly. On the bus, he was watching me intently and then when I stopped behind the bus driver and lifted my hand to pop the balloon he jumped from his seat with a look of horror on his face. He tried to reach me when the bus started its head-first plummet down the bridge.

The feeling of awkwardness and nervousness within me reach a new level and I shuffle away from him a little. “David,” the tone of my voice makes him look at me, which is not my intention. I see the light of the moon in his eyes and it makes me look away to focus on the silhouette of a dark tree not very far away from us. “We’ve all done things we now wish we didn’t. I honestly didn’t realise the bus would crash. Do you think I would have played that stupid prank if I knew I would end up here? My mum and dad must be so sad and I’m not a bad person. Sometimes I do things which in hindsight are so stupid and childish, but now when I am doing them it seems funny and then the little man on my…” I stop talking. I have never, ever told another living soul about the little man on my shoulder, the voice in my head. I feel a tear run down my cheek and quickly I brush it away with the back of my hand.

He moves closer to me. “I need you to shut up now.”

I turn my head to look at him and he kisses me.

I am not sure what to do. He hated me, then he says he loves me. Would all those little glares and glances mean he honestly did like me? Was he so insecure in himself, he would pretend he hated me, so his friends did not know he liked me? When I used to watch him in the school halls with his casual strut and super stardom status, he never paid any attention to me. Yes, sometimes he looked in my direction, but it was never to make eye contact, it was only because I happened to stand in the place where his eyes were looking at that moment.

He pulls gently on my lower lip. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since seventh grade.” He moves his lips to my ear and as his lips brush my skin, I shiver. I do realise I am being stupid and gullible. I should push him away from me. What do Carly and Mark think? Can they see us here in the blackness which has enveloped us? Do they also think I am being naive and stupid?

The little man on my shoulder says: He is playing a practical joke on you, and like an idiot, you are falling for it.

I sit back from David abruptly, pushing my palms against his chest. “No, we shouldn’t… I shouldn’t”

The little man on my shoulder cackles loudly and I realise the sound is not in my head anymore. It is coming from somewhere behind me. Quickly I look across my shoulder, but I cannot see anything in the darkness. The moon is not bright enough to make the night like day.

A faint flicker of light winks at me from the darkness. The light seems to bounce between the tree trunks.

My heart starts to pound, and I turn my head back to look at Mark.

Mark stands up from his sitting position and takes a step, pointing to the light. “What do you think that is?” In the darkness, I can see Mark’s eyes narrow as he squints to get a clearer view.

David jumps up to his feet. “I have no idea. Let’s go find out.”

I grab his hand. “We should first come up with a plan.”

He grins down at me. “A plan? My plan is to see what it is.” He pulls me up to stand next to him, and I take a step away from him to go to Mark. It is a natural instinct, but David pulls me back to his side. “You and Carly should wait here while Mark and I go have a look.”

Carly grabs onto my arm with both her hands.

“There is no way we are staying here on our own,” I insist.

Carly says, her voice tight with worry, “Maybe we should wait.”

“No way.” I cannot bear the fear building up in my chest, and I did not really want to find out what is causing the light, but I grasp Carly’s hand in mine and take a step forward.

We are slowly inching our way closer to the line of trees, staying alert and when a twig snaps under my foot I jump with fright. “Can you see anything?” I ask no-one, in particular, trying to keep the fear from my voice.

Mark says softly, “Not yet.”

“Thank you, for being here with me,” I tell him. “This is supposed to be me facing my demons.”

Mark nods his head. “If I didn’t ask you to help me find David, you’d be well on your way back to Earth by now. Are you okay?”

“I don’t know what to expect.”

Carly asks, worried, “So do you think your demon is expecting us?”

I shrug my shoulders and I know if something bad happens to anyone of us, we’ll never get a chance at redemption.

When we reach the trees, David pulls back a branch, flinching as it creaks and the sound echoes through the silent night air. Then he slips past the branch and motions for Mark to follow him.

The moon casts a faint glow on everything outside the forest, and now it is pitch black. There is a faint glow of a light, but I cannot see where it is coming from.

I feel David’s hand reach and then grip my fingers tightly in his as we walk further into the darkness.

After a few steps, the ground starts to slope down sharply, and we have to slow our pace even further to keep from losing our balance. The air feels frigid and cold, and I can feel it seep through my skin into me. It is as if it freezes me from the inside out. Is this the reason why everyone was huddled around that fire, because of the coldness in their souls? The air also smells different; it smells like sulphur.

I force myself to be brave as I take a deep breath, trying to choke down the burning sensation in my throat and then I stumble.

David pulls me back up and holds me close to his chest. “Are you okay?”

His heart is beating so fast; I can feel it through his chest.

“I’m okay,” I whisper, but I do not let go of him.

“There’s a large open area here,” Mark says softly, a little ahead of us.

A deep, guttural rumble echoes all around us.

“What was that?” Carly whispers.

Gently I push away from David and take a step forward. “Let’s keep moving, maybe if we’re lucky we’ll reach the other side. Maybe the large opening is our way out of here?”

As we enter a vast, great open area the faint light we have seen bouncing off the tree trunks around us lights up the entire area. It is an ethereal blue glow and I cannot see where it is coming from, but it illuminates the entire area.

Hundreds of dark shapes are lined with the furthest trees on the other side of the area, with hundreds more pushing from the sides. Every few moments the sea of shapes surges in one direction or the other as if they are swaying from side to side, like seaweed in the current of a river.

I turn to look at Mark, Carly, and David. I cannot think about the danger I have put them in, not now. This is all my fault and unknowing I have dragged them here with me.

Continue reading Chapter 20/25

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